Last Tuesday perusing the aisles of our local Sam’s Club, I came upon the Backyard Botanical Garden. I had a bit of drool forming on the corner of my mouth. Just think I could buy this and keep yellow dog out of my garden along with those pesky bunnies. I talked myself out of it. This was just a grocery trip to stock the freezer not a shopping trip to indulge my gardening frenzy. Of course, the festering began inside my head. Do I have room for it? Do I really need it? So then I had to share my dilemma with my mom. Now mind you, Bruce already told me to just buy it, but I can be a wee bit silly at times.
So after dinner on Wednesday I got a call from my mom and she announced that they would buy it for our anniversary present. Tantalizing! Then I began to survey my garden… where oh where to put it? I’ve learned from past events, things at Sam’s Club are ohhh so much bigger when you actually bring them into your home. Bruce and I walked through the backyard and decided we better pass. We would have to move this or squeeze it in there. So my dream of the Backyard Botanical Garden was dashed, or was it??
Saturday came and Bruce and I went flower shopping gobbling up lots of things. I was in the midst of planting frenzy when I got a call from my father via cell. “Does Bruce have a variable drill? Your mother bought that garden thing and I have to put it together. She decided she wanted it.” WHAT! She bought my botanical oasis herself! The jealousy was fuming. Not only did she buy my oasis she wanted to use our drill to put it together! The horror!
My parents arrive looking for their drill. I play nice all the while thinking of the glorious cucumbers that would grow on the trellis. Then she said if you still want it you can have it. You definitely have room for it. Then they began surveying my backyard. I think my dad was a bit overzealous on the hunt seeing for a moment that perhaps assembly would be diverted. Alas, I caved and gobbled it up for ourselves. There in lies the true story of two days of assembly!
So day one Bruce assembled the pieces and I planted over 42 plants that we bought the day before. All the while, I kept reminding him of the luscious veggies he would have! We were exhausted. Day 2 was even more of a trial on our nerves and bodies.
OK! So if you need 40 cubic feet and the bags cover 2 cubic feet, I thought simply you need 20 bags. Well, my mathematics on this was completely wrong. Now if I would have looked at the back of the bag. It would have told me to buy only 6 bags, but why do that when you KNOW you need 20. Any rate we needed 8 not 6, so take that back of the bag marketing know it all! Now after working hours in the garden the day before perhaps picking up bags that were 40 lbs each wasn’t the smartest move. We went to Lowes and a friendly white hair man helped us. Thank god he did. As we went back into Lowes we heard him tell the story about how he had to help two 30 years olds carry bags. AHHH YEAH, THAT’S RIGHT! We needed two people to throw those beasts into the back of the jeep. P.S. Miracle Gro is 40lbs and the cheaper garden soil is 27 lbs? Just a little tidbit I picked up on this garden adventure.
The timer that came with our oasis was either not working or I needed an engineering degree to figure it out. We got a $10.00 one that is so simple. Kasper may have it mastered by the end of the season.
Of course, being intelligent beings, we tested all pumps and irrigation hoses before the dirt was placed in. We then spent a good half hour lugging our bags of dirt into our new baby. Alas, the oasis was filled with beautiful dirt and ready to plant. I grabbed my spade and romaine lettuce and lunged in. Where as Bruce decided to give the pump a try. That’s when the earth shook. I heard bubbling and with in seconds Mt. Vesuvius erupted in my garden oasis! Molten Miracle Gro shut upwards in great spouts that shot across our backyard and threw dirt everywhere. Now, Kasper, loving all things water found this to be the most exciting thing he has ever seen. He still believes that this new structure must be for him, a new kind of toy, perhaps?
So of course the answer is electrical tape because it has more bend, Right? No, Didn’t work. After three attempts there was another trip to Home Depot for a new irrigation hose! So after two full days of fun the backyard oasis is operational! We have lettuce, radishes, squash, eggplant, peppers and cucumbers growing.